Child is supposed to be the Father of Man. It has been heard long ago and rightly so. But for over a decade or so in our country child has become the main hope of majority of families. Something is embedded into his mind fairly early in life . Resultantly, out of his own volition or unwillingly, he/she burns the midnight oil and has to try his best to attain a target mostly alone. Parents see a dream and offspings have to chase them even while being in fear of lagging behind. He /she has to face stiff competition.
2) Entry into a coaching institute has come as a sigh of relief. By way of discussing and sharing experience, the pace of success may be hastened and may be, topmost ladder is being reached. But conditions in these emerging institutions of learning has to be favourable.
3) A sort of gender bias too has to be confronted by a child in the formative stages.When a male child is born , it invariably calls for celebration but the reaction is reverse in respect of a female child. It has been observed so in some states, till recently. With our country fast catching up with rapid developments all over the world, our perceptions too need to change.Focus, however, continues to be on medical or engineering as a career even when so many viable vocations and avenues are available with fairly good pay package.
4) A Child gets his primary socialization within the precincts of the family. It is only when he is slightly older say ,three and a half to four years of age, that he gets a feel of a nursery school to begin the process of secondary socialization. Experiences ,however may vary between rural and urban settings. In many metropolitan or cosmopolitan cities, due to neck breaking work pressure or a lust to own a vehicle and a house at an early age, young parents ,heading nuclear families, put their tiny tots in the play schools. Soon without weighing pros and cons of their first exposure, they have to enter the four walls of a proper school atmosphere.
Expectations Have To Be Reasonable
5) It has been observed that within a short time span, parents begin expressing expectations from children ,more so from the boys. Extra curricular activities ,however are ignored. It may be due to happenings within the extended family or the neighbourhood.By the time, a child is in 8th or 9th standard, he / she has to work really hard not for their sake but for the sake of parents.It may, nonetheless, come with a price.A child who looks handsome or beautiful to begin with, gradually becomes serious due to career factor which is put into his head ahead of time. He is not only asked by relatives but also quizzed by the neighbours, as to what he/she wants to become, what profession was likely to be adopted by him ? Was he/she inspired by the success rate of cousins ?
6) Generally it is seen that not always elders or cousins in the family become the” reference groups”. Due to vast development of communication sector, idols can be and are from outside the family also.Easy Access to Internet and Cell phone from an early age play the role of a facilitator.
7) However, financial resources of not all the parents are sound or favourable vis a vis expenditure needed for coaching for competitive examinations to get entry into engineering or medical colleges.It goes without saying that an institute away from home is a costly proposition . However, many parents manage to send their wards after 10th class to competition oriented “factories”, such as, those mushrooming in Kota in Rajasthan.
As the thinking process begins fairly early when a child is in 8th Class, even if he does not wish, he is led to believe in bright sides of lives associated with a doctor or an engineer.
Stress Situation All The Way
8) Not all parents and guardians are exposed to the dark alleys of Coaching institutes.Once admission is ensured, they tend to relax. Neither parents nor wards have to bother for study and passing the 11th Class.It is understood that same is taken care of as per deal or arrangement. But conditions under which coaching is given may not he adequately known to the outside world.While studying, it is equally important to get good diet and maintain time with supplements of milk & fruit. An aspirant needs very much relaxation time in between and emotional support as also motivation and inspiration. Desire to clear probably the toughest examination of the world which NEET has become, is not an unworthy one but same should not lead to perpetual tension or stress by losing contact with the family of orientation. Unfortunately, it is happening.
9) Looking at the recent tragedies at Kota,there must have been many missing links or else three suicides would not have been committed within a period of two days. When such incidents come to notice, it leads to discovery about 17 such cases in 2016 and 19 in 2018 .Such unfortunate figures for other years are not available and during Covid pandemic, maybe, such a loss may not have happened. Such suicides may be happening in other parts of country also.But not every incident is reported.
Correct & Regular Career Updates Are Necessary
10) In coaching institute situation, degree of tension generally increases on the part of candidates as craze or first choice is always to get into coveted list of 3,500. Afterall, it is not easy to compete with 1,78 ,000 fellow students at a time. Despite increase in number of IIT’s or equally prestigious institutes, one has to be ready to draw a line somewhere.
Many other engineering institutes or medical colleges may have become better over the years but do the parents or the coaching institutes provide such an information to the aspirants? This may need to be answered.Also, how many of the” missed types” know that many who can’t make it to IIT’s, manage to win scholarship to many top grade universities of USA? No doubt, studies reflect that IITians have become most valuable exports of India to USA and same can not be undermined.
11) Back to the “factories” of Kota, according to media inputs, wayback in 2018, a TISS study had concluded that many students were found indisposed, anxious and unable to deal with the rapid pace of the place.
It is also felt that due to high expectation of parents also, many unwilling students may be joining coaching in large numbers. Almost all cannot possibly succeed but hope has to be kept alive. It is at back of their mind that in the event of their success, the drudgery of the family may disappear, apart from recouping the expenditure incurred on coaching.
Break From Study is A Must
12) Food, better environment and updated method of teaching/ coaching may be decisive but experience sharing and extra curricular activity is likely to ease the stress factor.Why should we expect everything in a package form from an institute? Better grooming by Parents in earlier classes, say, 8th class onwards may prepare a student for the ultimate task in a gradual manner.Time to time monitoring of students with some professional input may also prove to be a helpful device.
Possible Remedies
13) Now that tragedy has struck despite hectic schedule of students stretching upto 15 hours a day ,one is hearing about regulation of the coaching institutes, need to conduct an aptitude test and what not ?
In addition to these, slow or failing types shall have to be counselled carefully from time to time. A need has been rightly felt to exercise control and tighten the noose around the hostel and PG accommodation owners to take care of ventilation and adequate light in the study area.These could have been thought of, long ago.
14) Better late than never.That should be the guiding factor for days to come. But the shattered or affected families may not get their promising offspings back. Maybe, they will feel that they and their children were destined to offer sacrifice for others in the interest of the nation. Pursuit for excellance with sound character building must continue to get a boost without causing hurt.
About the Author : Dr. Aaloc Srivastav, Ex CS , Sikkim is a Senior Retd Bureaucrat and passionate about writing on his favourite subjects . The views shared by the author are his personal.
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